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Being Health-Conscious Living With HIV

Being Health Conscious. The best practices for anyone living with HIV and AIDS is to be health conscious. Being health conscious with HIV and AIDS means educating oneself about the virus, a nutritious low-fat diet, proper exercise, and taking the prescribed medications, all of which, I being HIV positive, am very slack on doing. To add to my lackadaisical health-conscious attitude, I am also a cigarette smoker, which is a huge no, no even without a detrimental health condition.

One reason I decided to be lax in taking my HIV medications is because one of the side effects of those medications is erectile dysfunction. But far more than the HIV medications the psychological impact of being HIV positive has turned me into a eunuch because of the ever-present awareness of my illness and the negative consequences that it may have on an innocent woman.

In other words, my genitals have effectively been removed since my dream and my desire for having a loving, caring relationship with a woman has been extinguished by the anxiety that I feel in being a carrier of this hideous virus. Thus, my diligence to be health conscious has been compromised by the feeling that my life, at least a wholesome life, was brought to a disgraceful, and a deserving end when I was diagnosed as being HIV positive.

Now this feeling of being a sub-human because of being HIV positive may well be a case of being too willing to sit on the pity pot and committing suicide by proxy, but what the hell no one lives forever.

My cigarette habit is not only a health-conscious issue but also one that makes me feel like I am a weak-minded person who has allowed himself to be placed under the control of a ragweed. I stop smoking every so often and then start blowing smoke again. The gruesome side of my cigarette habit is that I have been isolating myself from human contact as much as possible for the past number of years and cigarettes have become a murderous companion to ease the loneliness.

Just for today, I am clean and sober and have been so for twenty years since I stopped using crack cocaine. I am not saying that smoking cigarettes are a harder habit to break than drugs or alcohol, but I was younger when I stopped using drugs and saw some daylight ahead of me and had not compounded my health problem with an avalanche of bad choices and decisions that have made me feel even more inadequate and stupid, and less energized to pursue a vigorous health conscious agenda.

Anyone who has allowed themselves to start thinking as I have I would strongly suggest that they cut it out now. Being HIV or AIDS positive is not the end of life but is only one of our lives many challenges that must be faced and successfully managed

I am now old and ugly so for me the bridge has already fallen into the creek and sunk to the bottom, but a young person who is HIV or AIDS positive should live their life to the fullest and work to find a cure for the HIV and AIDS virus, or I should say, make those who have the cure for the HIV and AIDS virus release it.

Being health conscious does not only apply to someone who has an illness but to everyone who wants to be as mentally and physically sound as possible during this fleeting span of time of terrestrial existence.

For a person who is HIV or AIDS positive being health conscious also means being health conscious of others. I do not recommend self-imposed isolation as a method of containment but I do suggest that being very thoughtful and considerate of others is a workable approach to the containment of the HIV and AIDS virus.

I have done and said things during my life that I feel are deserving of death, so for me to be an animated cadaver is a fitting and just punishment for me. I detest being HIV positive. I abhor being a lethal weapon because of the blood that is coursing through my veins.

I hate that when I see a nice-looking woman my loathsome virus makes me speechless and immobile. I am ashamed of smoking cigarettes, which is why I do it as discretely as I can in public, but my clock has only a few more ticks left in it and if all goes well I will die before my murderous smoky companion kills me with a slow agonizing death.

Being health conscious is not merely a good thing to do but is a necessity if one has a desire to be mentally and physically strong and energetic. A person can allow themselves to fall into a sense of depression and quasi-hopelessness but at the end of the day, the day has come to an end, and life is too fragile and fleeting to waste a moment of it in anger and self-pity.


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